Relating To Love By Checking On The Stars And Being Down To Earth
Dr. Craig Martin
His ready smile, which is arm, inviting, and in and of itself could begin a conversation or set a person at ease – this characteristic was what I first noticed in my initial introduction to Dr. Craig Martin, the author of Elemental Love Styles and a comprehensive spiritual counselor. While a smile may seem like something trivial, that quality of putting someone at ease and allowing them to feel comfortable in his presence is essential to the work that Dr. Craig (as he’s often called) does in the world. While his biography labels him as an astrologer, spiritual counselor and relationship expert, these names only scratch the surface of Dr. Craig’s multifaceted experience and the talents he brings to his work with individuals and couples.
The doctor in his title refers to his background as a chiropractor, a skill which he combined for years with his training in the comprehensive holistic healing science of homeopathy in working with individuals. Decades of private practice combining this healing practice with relationship counseling and interfaith ministry allowed him to see a wide range of people and to compassionately guide them to understanding themselves – body, mind, heart and spirit – so they could live in a place of self-acceptance.
His specialty in working with people now is through the arena of relationships; helping people uncover and understand who they are through all of their relationships – with themselves, with their partners or significant others and in all of the ways that they interact in the world. For this, his ready smile and easy manner help provide an essential feeling of comfort and ease. He works with both individuals and couples of any orientation to help people see who they truly are, for from that place we can all effectively interact with each other.
We spend our entire lives trying to understand ourselves, through engaging in interactions with ourselves and others that meet our deepest needs for connection, for intimacy, for warmth, safety, security and personal growth. According to Dr. Craig, one of the ways that we can begin to understand ourselves is by exploring the lessons uncovered by our astrological profile and seeing the multifaceted understanding revealed through these archetypes.
Yet you don’t even need to know your birthdate to explore the stylistic nature of how you interact with other people in relationships to enjoy and benefit from his recent book, Elemental Love Styles. This is because the book includes an extensive questionnaire that helps the reader to engage in the practice of effective self-inquiry to examine one’s own patterns and preferences. In doing so, people can then identify how they relate to the elemental archetypes of earth, air, fire and water, qualities that say something about how we operate in the world. While these can relate to our astrology, and even to the Ayurvedic understanding of our internal makeup, they also shed some light on what we are looking for when choosing the person with whom we’d like to spend our every day, beyond the simple traits of eye color, hair color or whether someone prefers dogs or cats.
The premise of Elemental Love Styles, and of Dr. Craig’s practice, is that we all love in different ways. Miscommunications do not always happen because of intentional slights, but because people express love and connection differently, because two people can have varying interpretations of the same event based on their internal needs. Understanding who we are and what we need can help us to find love in a ways that meets those deepest needs – the longings and desires that we may not even be able to name, but which are the driving forces for how we interact with ourselves and with each other.
In addition to expounding upon the qualities of the elements, he writes about finding intimacy and the road trip of love, how we can choose awareness (rather than make excuses) and how we can embrace vulnerability to enjoy greater intimacy. And in the qualities of the elements, Dr. Craig is not merely descriptive. In speaking about the dramatic and self-absorbed nature of fire, for example, he also offers the means by which we can DIG into ourselves through honest self-reflection and Dynamic Inner Growth. This is one of the strengths of his work: we see what is in front of us along with our pitfalls and potholes and we learn how to not only not fall in, but use these understandings to create positive shifts in our lives. Along the way, he incorporates telling examples allowing us to see people’s patterns.
As many helpful spiritual titles do, Love Styles was born from the author’s personal journey of learning to understand how he could participate in a successful, loving and supportive relationship. It’s a journey that he describes with vulnerability and honesty. It’s an important opening, since the ability of any spiritual teacher or healer at any level to work with others initiates from the work and exploration they’ve done with themselves. Dr. Craig is an example of someone who not only invites you in with his ready smile, but someone who has authentically spent the time navigating the twists and turns of his own inner self and his own relationship proclivities. From here, he has drawn a map that is invaluable for the rest of us.
Dr. Craig’s insightful work is far more than can be contained in one simple tome. He’s already working on his next book, when he’s not sitting across the room from someone, or spending time with his partner and their dog, hiking or cooking. His ability to put together a recipe and allow the alchemical mix of flavors to create something delicious is an art that he brings to his writing, his public speaking (some clips from his numerous television appearances can be seen on his web site) and his work guiding a person through the process of understanding themselves with insight and compassion.
For more information about Dr. Craig Martin, visit: doctorcraig.com.
By Felicia M. Tomasko, RN
Felicia Tomasko has spent more of her life practicing Yoga and Ayurveda than not. She first became introduced to the teachings through the writings of the Transcendentalists, through meditation, and using asana to cross-train for her practice of cross-country running. Between beginning her commitment to Yoga and Ayurveda and today, she earned degrees in environmental biology and anthropology and nursing, and certifications in the practice and teaching of yoga, yoga therapy, and Ayurveda while working in fields including cognitive neuroscience and plant biochemistry. Her commitment to writing is at least as long as her commitment to yoga. Working on everything related to the written word from newspapers to magazines to websites to books, Felicia has been writing and editing professionally since college. In order to feel like a teenager again, Felicia has pulled out her running shoes for regular interval sessions throughout Southern California. Since the very first issue of LA YOGA, Felicia has been part of the team and the growth and development of the Bliss Network.