Cultivate the Superpower of Empathy with Dr Judith Orloff
The Genius of Empathy is the book that we all need right now. Buy it today. Read it. Practice the techniques and excercises shared in these pages. Tell your friends.
Whether or not we identify ourselves as an empath, or see ourselves as empathic, Dr Judith Orloff says that “empathy is the key to our survival.” She says that the genius of empathy “gives you a wiser, more loving inner resource to guide you and let you view difficulties with more empathic, discerning eyes.”
Dr Judith Orloff says that, “Empathy itself is a healing act.”
Just how do we utilize this healing energy, this healing act? Throughout The Genius of Empathy, Dr Orloff has included a number of practical and accessible tools for cultivating your own inner empath.
The Genius of Empathy: Healing Yourself, Soothing Your Nervous System
In Part 1, Dr Orloff offers a set of teachings focused on “Healing Yourself, Soothing Your Nervous System.” In a world that feels more overstimulating and uncertain by the day, having healthy solutions for self-soothing is life-changing.
Some of the essential topics she covers include identifying the Four Styles of Empathy and a discussion of Misconceptions of Empathy. She also tells us how we can all implement what she calls the practice of the sacred pause. This involves taking a beat, a pause, a moment, to reflect before speaking or taking action.
One of my favorite practical suggestions is the Four Healing Steps to Practice Self-Empathy.
These instructions can be used as a daily practice; as she says, “The following four steps demonstrate how to bring self-empathy into your daily life. It will help you reprogram unproductive thoughts, elevate your self-talk, and awaken the healing energy of the heart.”
Speak to Yourself with Kindness is the first of these four steps. I found this to be a reminder of the importance of self-empathy, self-practice, and connecting within. If we paid attention to our thoughts and self-talk, we might see where we would benefit from more kindness in a moment-by-moment practice.
Dr Judith Orloff Speaks to LA YOGA about The Genius of Empathy
The Four Healing Steps to Practice Self-Empathy are:
- Speak to Yourself with Kindness.
- Connect to Your Heart.
- Make a General Empathic Statement to Yourself.
- Make a Specific Empathic Statement to Yourself.
We can all learn, as Dr Orloff says, to use these tools to “learn to comfort yourself and be your own best friend.” In one of the chapters, we learn to “Cultivate Self-Empathy: Restoring Yourself with Kindness.”
The Genius of Empathy: Healing Your Relationships
As we learn to become our own best friend, we can apply these teachings to how we relate to those around us. Part 2 is focused on “Healing Your Relationships.”
Here are tools for holding space for others through empathic listening, suggestions for healthy giving, and practicing empathy with family, friends, and coworkers.
The Genius of Empathy: Healing the World
In Part 3, Dr Orloff shares how we can utilize these practices for “Healing the World.” Since we live interconnected lives, sharing energy with our global community, practices that help us become better leaders, release resentments, and care for each other are essential for our survival. In this section, Dr Orloff offers real-world examples that feature practical strategies to address stressful work situations, being a new paradigm leader who can create a happy and even playful environment in the workplace, and managing people’s mistakes.
Her discussion of forgiveness is compassionate and empathic even on the page.
“What is forgiveness? It’s an emotional cleasing and self-healing process where you compassionately release smaller and larger resentments to clear unwanted negativity.”
She applies discernment here as well, reminding us that “Forgiveness means different things in different situations.” It’s a reminder that throughout the book and her work, Dr Orloff emphasizes the essential lesson of discernment, of learning, practicing, and using skills for empathy. When we can use the skills, we can tap into and fully live the healing potential of the practices.
“How can I come from my heart, not just my head?” This book offers a loving map to guide us all on the daily journey to loving ourselves through everything (as Dr Orloff says) by living in the space of the heart, with kindness, boundaries, and most importantly, with skill.
Order a copy of The Genius of Empathy.
Felicia Tomasko has spent more of her life practicing Yoga and Ayurveda than not. She first became introduced to the teachings through the writings of the Transcendentalists, through meditation, and using asana to cross-train for her practice of cross-country running. Between beginning her commitment to Yoga and Ayurveda and today, she earned degrees in environmental biology and anthropology and nursing, and certifications in the practice and teaching of yoga, yoga therapy, and Ayurveda while working in fields including cognitive neuroscience and plant biochemistry. Her commitment to writing is at least as long as her commitment to yoga. Working on everything related to the written word from newspapers to magazines to websites to books, Felicia has been writing and editing professionally since college. In order to feel like a teenager again, Felicia has pulled out her running shoes for regular interval sessions throughout Southern California. Since the very first issue of LA YOGA, Felicia has been part of the team and the growth and development of the Bliss Network.